Welcome to Kibitzing with Kytherea! Whether you're looking for guidance and support or just help settling a specific problem or dilemma, Kibitzing with Kytherea offers something for everyone.

There are many obstacles and barriers that we have to face in life. We have the choice to confront them and overcome them or deny them and remain troubled. Many times it is the fear of the unknown that causes us to remain comfortable in our chaos. Let Kytherea help you face the unknown and guide you on your journey.

Are you a wood elf in love with a dark elf and your parents just won't understand? Are you a troll who rather eat vegetables then a nice juicy gnome and are afraid to admit it? Are you looking for a way to tell a guild mate that passing gas in the guild hall pool to make bubbles is not funny, it is just disgusting? It is Kytherea's desire to make you feel safe and secure as you explore issues of all types. She wants to provide you with support and advice in hopes of alleviating your problems and making each day more productive.

Send your problems by email to Kytherea at cdelzer@soe.sony.com with "Kibitzing with Kytherea" as the subject. Kibitzing with Kytherea will be a weekly feature on EQPlayers and will be scheduled to appear on Monday afternoons.


NOTE: This is a role play feature that is intended for entertainment purposes only!


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Kibitzing With Kytherea
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Dear Auntie Kyth,

Please advise. Mummy and daddy told me and my sister that if we each did six chores for them, we could play with some old blankets. We both did the chores. Mums and Da were so proud. They gave me a blanket for my very own! OK. It had a few big holes in it, but I loved that blankie and I set about improving it as best I could. Whenever I did more chores, I would take some of the reward I got and make patches. Soon my blankie was warmer and more beautiful than ever! I just needed to patch one more hole and it would be better than ever. Sis was better at gathering scraps of fabric. She finished hers yesterday! Woot big sis!

Today I came home to find HUGE HOLES where there had previously been original fabric. I was in tears! All my patches were still there, but now there was almost as much missing as when I first got it. I asked M & D what happened. They said my patched blanket was too nice for me - that I had too easy a time making my improvements and if I wanted something that nice, I'd have to work at it more so I'd appreciate it better. They pointed out that all my improvements were still intact. They just decided to take back some of their initial gift. I went off to tell Sis the news and commiserate with her. I found her in her room smoothing out the wrinkles in HER blanket. It was whole!! I am at a loss to express my consternation and outrage!!!! I told her what our wicked parents had done and she seemed rather unconcerned. She told me that cutting holes in her blanket would have been dreadful because it was finished and that would have been marring a perfectly good blanket. Apparently cutting huge holes in mine was entirely acceptable because there were still holes in it and therefore it was a worthless rag anyway.

So what I need from you is a recipe. For poison. Something excruciatingly slow and unbearably painful. Three doses ought to about do it.

signed,
Your Loving Niece

Dear Loving Niece,

While I understand that you are upset with your sister's blatant disregard for your feelings and off-handed insult about your lovely blanket in the works being a worthless rag, I can not condone the use of poison to get her back. It may please you to get revenge for her hurtful statements and lack of sympathy but in the end you would probably feel worse for having caused her such unbearable and excruciating pain.

Your sister's blanket may be whole and beautiful now, but with time she will lose interest in it because of the ease in which she was able to complete it. Your blanket however will turn out much more beautiful and meaningful to you because of the extra loving work you have put into it. In the end yours will be larger, warmer and much more attractive.

Sincerely,
Auntie Kyth


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Dear Kytherea,

I've been feeling very bad recently, and I need your help. I am a High Elven Enchantress, loyal to Felwithe and raised to love the Great Mother, Tunare. I was raised to love and respect the natural order of things, but recently that has changed. I was studying some ancient scrolls of lore, deep within the library in the Plane of Knowledge, when I came upon an incantation. I muttered it to myself, pondering what it could possibly be for, when a portal opened behind me. Out stepped a dapper little halfling. He looked oddly familiar to me, and without as much as a greeting began to tell jokes and create magical fireworks.

Then came the part that started my problems.

The halfling (who I had realized looked much like the god, Bristlebane) had attracted a small crowd of people who were annoyed by the commotion in the previously quiet library. To my astonishment, he began to turn them into odd creatures from throughout the many realms of Norrath and beyond. Then, with a wink, the odd visitor disappeared. I was astounded. I have dedicated my life to illusions, but I had no way of duplicating the complicated spells that he seemed to cast without trying.

I am obsessed. I have found spells that allow me to cast illusions of all of the races of Norrath, and even the Vah Shir. I've even found spells that allow me to turn into an orc, skeleton, or many of the more common creatures of Norrath. But to be able to transform into any being! Through concentration, I have learned to cast illusions on others without their consent, much as this jester has, but I still crave his powers. I have begun running through highly populated areas, turning innocent bystanders into scare crows and chodaki. I make ogres appear to be frogloks blessed by Marr, and I turn gnomes into trolls. All this in an attempt to curry favor with the god Bristlebane so that he might bless me with the power he has granted that odd halfling (who is obviously one of his minions).

I feel guilty now. I was raised to accept nature and nurture it, and now I am turning my back on Tunare and changing the natural order of things. I still love the Great Mother, and respect her teachings, but in an attempt to curry favor with the Mighty Trickster, am I compromising her values? I don't want Tunare to be angry with me, but my thirst for the knowledge of the powers of illusions are driving me. What am I to do?

Obsessed and depressed,
Innania Realitychanger

Dear Innania,

Coveting the power of another and seeking to gain that same power with total disregard to the natural order of the world can have dire consequences. I am sure Tunare can appreciate a good joke from the Trickster now and then and I'm sure even the innocent bystander who find themselves as targets of your pranks can see the humor in the situation, before long you will have a mob of angry people after you. I think that should this come to pass Tunare may very well turn her back on you and then where will you be?

The Trickster is an odd fellow and would probably delight in the mischief you cause and even in the fact that the Great Mother has removed you from her favor for your actions. However it is also likely that he is getting just as much of a kick out of seeing you try to curry his favor so exuberantly. I am afraid that he would enjoy watching you try so hard and cause such humorous chaos that your goal in this endeavor would ultimately fail as he continued letting you go about your attempts without granting you any powers. It is rare that 2 deities will share a single being's worship.

You need to sit down and do some deep soul searching and decide if you wish to continue following the ways of Tunare or give up her ways for the mischievous ways of Bristlebane.

Sincerley,
Kytherea